Melanie Bell

Author, Writer, Editor

Tag Archives: community


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NaNoWriMo Was a Wild Time

I started NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) this November as an incentive to finish my fantasy novel, the one I’d been working on for a year and a half. At 55,000 words in, it was rolling along toward a conclusion, but it hadn’t gotten there yet. When I applied last year for a grant I didn’t receive, I listed November as a planned deadline for completing my novel draft. Without funding, I shelved some of my other project ideas, but I thought – hoped – the novel would prove doable, at least.

I’d found renewed energy for the project on my writing retreat in France this September. Our facilitator, best-selling novelist Julie Cohen, had told me the structure wasn’t working and encouraged me to restructure the whole thing. Which I did, one memorable day, with three colors of post-it notes sprawled across a bed. Those post-its now live in a notebook of mine, but it was an interesting experience to have them all over the furniture, and to think deeply about how my story needed to move forward.

Then, in October, I moved home, so not a lot of writing happened for a month. A lot of furniture shopping and adjustment happened instead. By the time November rolled around, my flat was furnished and felt more like an abode than an empty space. I was ready to come back to the novel.

Much like the writing retreat, so vivid in recent memory, I wasn’t sure how much I’d get done during NaNoWriMo. I’d done a version of it once, finishing a novella during lockdown in 2020. As proud as I felt of the novella at the time, that was 25,000 words, not 50,000 (as per the NaNo goal), and not all of them were written in November. (Although given the challenges of lockdown, I would give myself an A+ that year!) I even blogged about different ways of getting inspired for the monthly challenge, before attempting to tackle it myself.

But 50,000 words is a lot. I’d always side-eyed the challenge or thought it best suited to speedier writers than myself. I like to line edit as I go. Some writers speak of silencing the inner editor and writing a messy first draft. After doing multiple editing jobs, my “inner editor” is a professional with 10+ years of experience, so I usually find that her input makes my drafts better. Thus, I let her do her thing. But I came into this challenge believing that I wasn’t fast.

Here’s the great thing about self-awareness: it helps you navigate the world and find the right contexts. The downside is that the self you’ve invested in being aware of can change, and your understanding has to alter accordingly to keep up. Sometimes knowing your limits is a form of self-care, and sometimes it’s simply fear.

I had a relatively quiet schedule in November, allowing me to try the challenge. “I’ll finish my novel by the end of the month,” I thought, somewhat apprehensively. I suspected it would take less than the 50K to get to the end of my allotted plot. 

In fact, it did. It only took 32K. I finished it on the 15th of the month. 

My past self would probably read that line with goggle-eyes and ask, “How?!” The first thing I did was join the regional NaNo group. They had an online community where participants chatted and held events regularly. People seemed friendly, and it was exciting to be involved in something so intense with a whole bunch of other people, cheering each other on. There were two in-person events as well. I couldn’t make the first one, but the second, at the end of the month, was packed full of people typing furiously. The Municipal Liaisons brought stickers, an analog spreadsheet, a jar full of writing prompts, and a plastic dragon to place atop the laptop of whoever won the latest word war.

Most of our events centered around “word wars,” virtual sprints (using a tool called Sprinto on a Discord forum) where people join and compete to write the most words. I often enjoy writing in longer periods where I can focus and lose track of time, but the sprints proved useful and motivating. They provided accountability and a social aspect to the often solitary activity of writing.

Taking part in a few long writing days with the NaNo group resulted in a lot of writing. Once I finished my novel, I still had words – and half a month of time – to spare. Before NaNo, I’d planned a short story set in the same fantasy world as my novel but hadn’t had time to write it. I drafted that story – another 7,000 words. I still had more words left. I’d had a few ideas in mind for what to work on next, but I ended up starting something different and am now drafting a science fiction novel. 

My highlights of the NaNo experience were meeting a group of supportive and fascinating people on the Discord (and in person), finishing my novel draft (!), hitting 50K words on the 21st, and the intrinsic reward of devoting more time and energy to writing. It’s so easy to sideline personal projects. NaNoWriMo affords recognition to the act of committing to one. It felt really nice to “win” something, even if in practice, it means that I got… a virtual badge. It’s not every day that adults have a chance to get a prize, let alone one that validates doing something you want to do. 

For November Me, writing facilitated mental health. I write a little most days, and of course I write for my job, but November operated on another level. There was one day this month when I didn’t write, and it felt like a slump. I noticed that and wrote all the other days, even if the time was short and the word count was low. I also appreciated allowing myself long focus days when I didn’t push myself to get anything “more important” done. The bills and cleaning could wait until the next day.

Maybe I don’t always work as slowly as I’d believed. Maybe I really can be as productive as I imagined being… at least sometimes. My inner editor slowed down, but remained in place. I made more typos as I sped up, and then fixed them, for instance. And my hyper-focused month felt great!

I had a freelance project in late November, which pushed me to meet the word count goal more quickly once I realized it was feasible for me to meet it. I also attended opening night for my short play, which was part of a December showcase at the Tower Theatre. I kept writing small amounts of words and adding to the science fiction story as well as writing other things. I got feedback on the short story and was pleasantly surprised by how well others thought it worked despite the speed of its drafting. I also enjoyed meeting new people and hope to stay involved with the online community throughout the year.

So, I’d say NaNoWriMo was a success. I hope to do it again next year, and to maintain some of the writing habits I acquired in my daily life. I guess this old dog could learn new tricks after all! 


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So You Want to Write in Lockdown?

How are you all doing? Here in London, we’re well into lockdown #3. Remember lockdown hobbies, and the optimism with which some people took up making homemade sourdough bread and learning new languages? If you’re like me, enthusiasm for indoor activities has waned a bit by now.   

Writing is one of the things keeping me going as I work from home, socialize (as much as it’s possible to do so) from home, and veg out… all in the same general vicinity. As much as it can be a source of vitality and energy, though, it can also be hard to do consistently during this time. And people wanting to try writing for the first time while their lives have moved indoors face the additional challenge of getting started.    

Here are a few things that have energized my writing at one point or another during the quarantimes.

Write socially

When working on my first book, I went to Shut Up and Write sessions where a group of writers gathered, chatted briefly, and then got down to the process of quietly writing. Sessions were timed, and with other people doing the same thing around me, I got a lot of work done. I’ve benefited from finding similar group writing sessions over Zoom where friendly people encouraged each other, shared resources and updates, and provided accountability.

Try something new

Last year (during lockdown 2), I did NaNoWriMo for the first time. I tried writing something in a new genre (romance) and format (novella). During lockdown 1, I read about short nonfiction writing, tried pitching a big publication, and ended up writing something for the Huffington Post. Setting challenges for myself and trying new things kept the writing process fresh and interesting.   

Find a critique partner

Having someone else to exchange writing with keeps your manuscript from languishing forever unseen in your files. I found a fiction critique partner through social media and have been swapping work with her ever since. Having someone intelligent and responsive to exchange feedback with has been helpful and encouraging, and means I’m writing more. 

Take advantage of your personal schedule

If you’re working from home now, like me, you might have gained time back from your daily commute. Try scheduling writing in that now-freed calendar space. Another way of taking advantage of your schedule is knowing your body’s clock. I’ve been reading about chronotypes, or the variations in people’s biological clocks, and recognizing why I’ve never been one of those people who got up and wrote early in the morning. I don’t have to be! We all have different times when we’re at our creative and productive peaks, and maybe learning about yours will help you get more writing done, too.  

Write about what you’re experiencing

During the pandemic, I’ve helped process the stress of a radically changing life and environment by journaling (i.e. inelegantly venting about everything) and writing poems about the virus, Zoom calls, and shifting restrictions. It’s been a wonderful outlet. 

…Or not

Sometimes I just want to escape the 2020s. I’ve found solace in writing fiction set in a pre-COVID world and in other, imagined worlds. Do you wish you were somewhere else? Writing can take you there!

Have you been putting pen to paper or fingers to keyboard in lockdown? What keeps you writing?


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Creative Coping

My local park in the spring during lockdown

I write this from home, where I now do my full-time job, giving new meaning to the term “in-house”! A spider plant from work sits on my kitchen table. I grabbed it in a panic when the UK government announced that all non-essential workers would henceforth be working from home. I didn’t want it to die. A month ago, my aunt was in the hospital, unconscious and on a ventilator. I’m grateful that she is now coronavirus-free; not everyone has been so fortunate.  

A lot is going on. Many of us are confined to our quarters, dodging our neighbors whenever we leave the house lest someone be carrying an infection. Some countries are starting to reopen spheres of public life, with mixed results. Socioeconomic divisions are more visible than ever. Some people have been laid off, some are balancing childcare and professions in the same living space, and some continue to work in hazardous conditions. People’s access to resources and private space varies widely. Even for the most privileged, though, living through COVID-19 isn’t easy. We are all dealing with increased stress, anxiety, and uncertainty.

While it’s harder for our brains to focus when they are under this kind of pressure, creativity has come through for many of us as a way of coping with a changed and stressful environment. People are telling funny stories about their pets as coworkers, taking up baking and crafts, and creating virtual events and communities that didn’t exist before. 

Why is creativity useful now? For one thing, it’s a way of expressing ourselves, channeling our anxieties and experiences of this strange new world by creating something new. For another, it can be calming, with the process of making art or crafts grounding us when we have limited opportunities to engage with the physical world. Creativity is also born of resourcefulness – limited ingredients in the pantry, for instance, can spark new meal ideas, and museums’ challenge to recreate famous works of art with objects at home have yielded impressive results. 

I’ve found that my attention span has dwindled, and I’m not as focused on longer projects as I have been at other points. Briefer ideas and bursts of expression are more my speed in these isolation days. I’ve been taking photos during daily government-permitted exercise outings and writing a lot of poetry about the virus. I’ve made kimchi for the first time, with this recipe yielding good results. I’ve enjoyed an online poetry writing retreat and read free e-books that authors have shared. Making stuff and enjoying things that others make reminds me that hope persists. We are experiencing collective challenges, but we can still bring new and beautiful things into the world in the midst of them.   

What creative activities are helping you get through the pandemic?


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Thoughts on the 2018 IEA Conference and Community

In July I attended and presented at the International Enneagram Association Global Conference in Cincinnati. I’ve been coming to the IEA conferences on and off for the past ten years, and have noticed a marked change in the last few. The early Enneagram conferences I attended focused heavily on individual growth, experiential practices (such as shamanic journeying and breathwork), and theory. Recently, there has been an increased emphasis on interrelationship and community building, with panels, discussions, and highly interactive talks. The theme for this year’s conference articulated this sentiment explicitly: Building Bridges: Collaborating in Community.  

The keynote address, by local author and consultant Peter Block, stands out as one of my favorite parts of the conference. His talk, “Community: The Structure of Belonging,” reached beyond the spiritual “icebreakers” I’ve experienced at many IEA sessions to facilitate small-group discussions that drew out people’s feelings around participation and reached beyond social niceties to a point of truth. He discussed ways to physically and socially restructure a room so that people are engaged with each other rather than in unquestioned power dynamics, and drew attention to the dangers of like-mindedness: how will we learn and grow if everyone in the room is thinking the same sorts of things?    

My friend Chloé Keric-Eli and I made our own strides toward collaboration beyond our comfort zones. We are each certified with one of the two leading Enneagram schools, The Enneagram Institute in my case and The Narrative Tradition in Chloé’s, and she noted to me last year that these two schools seldom have crossover. Chloé teaches in French while I teach in English, although we each speak both languages. We are both under 40, making us “young” teachers in the Enneagram field, which skews older than most professional realms. (I was pleased to see that the number of younger conference participants is growing; when I first began coming to these conferences, I was one of about four people under 30, and was actually told by one participant that the field was “dying out” because “we’re all fossils”!)

Another factor we had in common was growing up and living in different countries, leading to our presentation topic of “Where Culture Meets Type.” I learned a great deal from working with Chloé, a committed, enthusiastic facilitator whose style differs dramatically from my own. As an Enneagram Type Seven, she generates wide-ranging ideas; in contrast, I could witness and appreciate the critical, structured aspects of my own mind. We both gained valuable insights from our session participants. I was struck by their discussions about how they fit or didn’t fit within the cultures of their countries and families, and how these intersections had affected their lives.   

Another session I found particularly thought-provoking was Jessica Dibb and Deborah Ooten’s “Building Enneagram Communities That Last.” Both facilitators have succeeded at their session’s goal, with Jessica’s Inspiration Community in Baltimore and Deb’s Conscious Living Center in Cincinnati reaching many students and sustaining networks over the years. A cornerstone of this success is the acceptance and non-judgment they modeled from the front of the room. They encouraged facilitators not to “type” anyone for the next 30 days – an invitation toward this non-judgment – and led us in exercises that brought love and support to the forefront and had us reflect on our own challenges and engagement with communities, ending in an action step.

I appreciate that the IEA is thinking about questions of community. The Social Instinct has long been a blind spot in American culture. Contrived events and networking opportunities are created for “socializing” without reshaping the fundamental structures that might address true interpersonal needs, such as creating (or even acknowledging the importance of) social safety nets or genuine support networks. Many of us are isolated, with inner work movements such as the Enneagram often mirroring the individualistic focus we are accustomed to.

The challenge in moving an inner work sphere toward greater community engagement is to ensure it grows beyond the surface, reaching toward inclusivity without leaving other needs behind. In the spirit of Peter Block’s emphasis on asking “uncomfortable questions,” here are a few I am left with  in the wake of the conference. How can future conferences address the needs of all three Enneagram Instincts, providing comfort, stimulation, and interrelatedness in concert? How can the Enneagram reach demographics its teaching structures aren’t traditionally set up to reach, without changing their fundamental wisdom – or is fundamental change called for?

How can the Enneagram community be big enough to hold contradictory views and approaches, and do these contradictions point to a common aim? How can people work constructively with their types within their preexisting relationships, outside of conference or workshop settings? Who gets left out of the Enneagram, and how can this movement ensure that no one needs to be left out – that anyone who wants to participate, no matter how different from other participants, is included and worked with?   

I don’t have the answers. What I do have is a sense that these questions are important ones to grapple with. Perhaps, in searching for their answers, this work will have wider and truer impact.


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Meeting the Instinctual Needs of Different Organizations

IMG_20150619_213544Co-written with Kacie Berghoef

Working with different organizations is a fascinating study in contrasts. Moving from one group to another, we’ve witnessed focuses and needs that required vastly different approaches.

The Enneagram’s Instincts are a useful model for understanding the priorities and needs of organizations as well as individuals. The Instincts represent unconscious drives, or groups of related behaviors, that seek to get our core needs met. They are a more fundamental part of the way we work than personality type, and can be viewed as an independent mini-typology. People of each personality type can be driven by each of the three Instincts. We share all three, but they are present in individuals and groups to varying degrees, with one running the show and shaping core values.

Different dominant Instincts in organizations call for different approaches. Here are three case studies from our teaching to demonstrate what each Instinct looks like as a dominant focus in organizations, and to share ideas about how to meet the needs of these different types of groups.

Social

A group we worked with recently was dominated by the concerns and energy of the Social Instinct, which is focused on navigating community dynamics. A non-profit that exists to serve the needs of a marginalized community, its team members are a good mix of members of that community and external advocates. When we walked through the door, we saw people milling around, checking in with each other. The room buzzed with talk. It was clear from the way people interacted, before and during our workshop, that inclusion was a priority.

Unsurprisingly for this organization, the workshop we’d been invited to teach focused on communication; it became clear that this group had brought us in to meet Social Instinct needs. We took our cues from the group and focused on creating avenues for engagement. We prioritized group activities that facilitated understanding between members, and left the floor open for lots of questions and discussion.

Self-Preservation

After working with that lively group, the next one came as a bit of a surprise. This organization was focused on holistic health and wellness, and the physical space reflected that philosophy. Soft colors abounded, and rooms were spacious. Our point person was ready to attend to any physical needs our presentation involved, from tweaking the air conditioning to making sure we had writing supplies. We’d arrived in a headquarters dominated by the Self-Preservation Instinct, which is focused on preserving stability, well-being, and resources.

The people at our workshop seemed as mellow as the space. They were quiet, composed, and moved with deliberation. It soon became clear that they wanted a workshop that matched the organization’s stabilizing values. They prioritized comfort in their space, so we moderated things like temperature and seating, striving to make sure the group was comfortable. In our activities, we focused on mindfulness, giving participants time to relax and ground themselves.

Transmitting / Sexual

Another organization was interested in a growth-oriented workshop. As with the previous group, the environment was beautiful, but in a more attention-grabbing way. Both the space and the people shone with rich colors and decorations, and the group actively sought a non-traditional approach. This organization’s dominant influence is often called the Sexual Instinct in relationships or personal work, as it’s the drive behind reproduction. Transmitting is a more accurate description of this Instinct’s role in organizations, since it drives them to bring information, services, products, or messages into the world.

The group was enthusiastic and honed in on us as speakers. They wanted a workshop that would push them to see themselves more clearly and make changes. Picking up on this Transmitting group’s driven energy, we worked on making our material and delivery fresh and exciting to keep their attention. We brought in innovative approaches and engaged with the group’s focused follow-up questions as they sought to know more.

Think about the groups or teams that you’re a part of. Which Instinct runs the show for each one? What needs and strengths do these dominant Instincts present in the groups you know best?


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Finding Wisdom in Your Enneagram Type

Inspiration Village at Wisdom 2.0

Co-written with Kacie Berghoef

This past weekend, Kacie volunteered at the Wisdom 2.0 Conference in San Francisco. In an era where mindfulness practices are increasingly utilized in the business and tech world, Wisdom 2.0 provides a platform for like-minded people to connect and strategize around bringing empowered conscientiousness into the workplace. This weekend offered an opportunity to share insights and witness the wisdom we all have to contribute.

We see the Enneagram as a powerful tool to bring greater wisdom into the world – whether it’s in businesses, communities, or ourselves. What the Enneagram shows us is that there are many types of understanding and insight one can have – nine, to be specific! Our own wisdom helps us take action in ways that strengthen our communities, make our workplaces more productive, and deepen our bonds with others. We have the greatest access to the wisdom our type brings to the world, but as multifaceted human beings, we can access the brilliance of all nine types.

Here are a few kinds of wisdom that each Enneagram type has to offer:

Type One brings wisdom through integrity. Healthy Ones are fair and bring justice to the world around them. They become examples of walking your talk. They teach all of us to live honest lives.

Type Two brings wisdom through compassion. Healthy Twos are caring and bring unconditional love for self and others. They become examples of lovingly meeting others’ needs. They teach us how to care for ourselves.

Type Three brings wisdom through authenticity. Healthy Threes are accomplished and bring value to the world around them. They become examples of being your best self. They teach us how to take pride in who we are.

Type Four brings wisdom through self-awareness. Healthy Fours are sensitive and bring creativity to the world. They become examples of expressing your personal truth. They teach us how to cultivate our own voice.

Type Five brings wisdom through understanding. Healthy Fives are non-judgmental and full of open-minded curiosity. They become examples of finding innovative answers. They teach us how to be still in a busy world.

Type Six brings wisdom through guidance. Healthy Sixes are grounded and oriented to a sense of purpose. They become examples of knowing just how to provide support. They teach us how to be our own best advocates.

Type Seven brings wisdom through freedom. Healthy Sevens see limitless options and engage fully in life. They become examples of bringing joy to all facets of life. They teach us how to see the best in everything.

Type Eight brings wisdom through confidence. Healthy Eights are protective and empower others around them. They become examples of living fully without apology. They teach us how to find our internal strength.

Type Nine brings wisdom through acceptance. Healthy Nines are receptive and fully self-possessed. They become examples of living harmoniously. They teach us how to live in a way that is connected to the world around us.

What kind of wisdom do you bring? What’s one action you can take this week to use this wisdom to improve the world around you?


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San Francisco Neighborhoods by Enneagram Type

IMG_20141215_173728Co-written with Kacie Berghoef

Enneagram types are not only found in people. They also exist in the spirits of places and cultures. When we traveled to Portugal for the European Enneagram Conference last year, we found ourselves in a somber country of beautiful tiled buildings and fado performances: soulful, melancholy musical laments. We’d arrived in a type Four country. Returning to the much faster paced U.S., we picked up strains of Three (efficiency, racing to the top) and Seven (endless entertainment options). Workplace cultures can likewise embody types, as do cities and communities. Just for fun, we’ve put together an Enneagram tour of the neighborhoods in our home city, San Francisco. Whatever your type, it truly has something for everyone!

Type One – The Financial District. High-reaching architecture and manicured parks frame the orderly Financial District, where every day on the clock, smartly dressed people go to work. This part of the city is where business gets done, and it maintains firm boundaries by closing down on evenings and weekends. It features a selection of ethically sourced restaurants.

Type Two – Noe Valley. Nurturing and family-oriented, there are lots of events for kids, and during the daytime you’ll see numerous parents with young children walking down the street. This neighborhood is attractive and beautifully maintained, while minimizing pretension. Local business on 24th Street take care of residents with frequent discounts and free samples.

Type Three – Pacific Heights. Image is particularly important in this neighborhood full of beautifully restored Victorian homes. This area of the city boasts the highest-end stores and boutiques in the city, and residents are well-dressed and take pride in their accomplishments and appearance. The neighborhood looks and feels good and exudes self-confidence.

Type Four – The Mission. A traditionally Mexican neighborhood, these days it hosts an eclectic group, from its traditional residents to quirky artists to tech employees. This edgy neighborhood values individuality and attracts funky music venues and coffee shops. Murals flourish everywhere. It’s proud of the gritty edge it retains even as the area gentrifies.

Type Five – South of Market (SOMA). San Francisco’s tech sector, which attracts a lot of Fives, is centered in this neighborhood. Originality, innovation, ideas, and a practical way of life rule here. Cloistered among modern apartment buildings and convenient amenities, SOMA residents can remain in a bubble detached from SF’s other communities.

Type Six – Bernal Heights. Highly community oriented, this neighborhood wants input from all its voices. It has a community center, neighborhood watch, and frequent meetings all residents are invited to attend. Residents greet each other as they walk by. Bernal Heights takes care of its own, highly valuing long-term, committed residents.

Type Seven – The Castro. San Francisco’s traditionally gay neighborhood is inclusive and fun for all. Endless bars, clubs, entertainment, and other nightlife stay open late, and it hosts several festivities and street fairs throughout the year. There are fun, quirky shopping options, and residents aren’t afraid to get wild. The atmosphere here is celebratory and exciting.

Type Eight – The Fillmore. Tough and sturdy, San Francisco’s gentrifying historically Black neighborhood requires some street smarts but is protective of both its residents and visitors. Edgy music venues and an annual jazz festival create a loud, festive atmosphere where people come from all over to live large for a little while.

Type Nine – The Outer Sunset. On the outskirts of San Francisco, this neighborhood is slow-paced and laid-back. Ocean Beach and Golden Gate Park allow for peaceful communing with nature. A longer ride on public transportation from downtown than some suburbs, it can feel like a beautiful enclave tucked away from the rest of the city.

It can be useful to know the culture and values of the places and communities you move in day to day. Which types’ values are most represented in your country, community, and workplace?